Tuesday, November 27, 2012

So why now?

I've never been a big fan of dating. It is sometimes stressful, often exhausting, mostly confusing.  And it doesn't get any easier as you get older. In fact, I think it only becomes more difficult.  You no longer have the excuse of being young and dumb and you can't blame bad decisions on inexperience.  The only excuse that seems to work is the simple fact that it's been eons since your last date and you've simply forgotten the basics.   If you somehow manage to get past all of that, then dating has the potential to be almost enjoyable, possibly successful, and most of the time, even fun!

Dating for me seems so different now than it was 15 years ago. Before, I had to gather all my courage up to make a phone call.  Now, all I have to do is text. Before, I could go out with my friends and meet people at the bars.  Now, I can't even remember the last time I frequented such an establishment.  Before, my friends all had friends who had friends.......  Now, all my friends are married and so are their friends.  Before, I had all the time in the world. Now, my time is filled up with life's responsibilities.  Before, I wanted to have a boyfriends in the worst way. Now, it's something that could be nice, but isn't on my list of priorities, not even in my top ten.

When I first separated from my now exie, I dabbled in the dating pool.  But as I look back on that period in my life, I think it was in actuality, just a form of "rebounding".  I thought I had deep feelings for people, but really it was just me missing the company.  After about 8 months of that, I decided I'd try online dating.  WOW. Now that was interesting.

This is the part in which I regret not blogging way back when.  The experiences I had and the people I met were so bizarre, it's nearly impossible to write about it all now.  But in a nutshell, here are a few of my infamous encounters:

1.  While talking on the phone with "B" (actually, I was listening while he did ALL the talking), he began to observe a woodpecker outside his window.  The conversation became all about the wonders of woodpeckers - by the way, I've NEVER thought woodpeckers were that interesting.  As I sat there in pure agony, I put "B" on speaker so I could text my girlfriend.  The text went something like this: Please save me! Call me in a few so I can use that as an excuse to get off the phone with this looney tune!"  SEND. Ummm...oops... who did I actually send the text to? Yep, you got it: "B"!  But because he was so incredibly naive, he read the text, thought it was a joke, and then continued on with his woodpecker wonders.

2.  After texting and then speaking on the phone over a period of about two weeks, I decided to meet "R" for dinner at a local Mexican food restaurant.  I arrived first and waited in the foyer.  Each time the door opened, I'd glance up to see if it was my date.  Finally, the door opened and in walked a tall, lean man, around the age of 45 (my guess).  But seeing that this wasn't my date, I turned away.  Well you can imagine my surprise when this tall, lean gentleman looked at me and said, "Susie?"  Uh....what??  I thought I was on hidden camera or something.  This was NOT the guy that I had been communicating with over the past few days.  My guy was shorter, stockier, darker hair, younger.  The exact opposite of the  man staring at me.  I thought about pushing past him and running away, but I didn't.  Instead, we went to a table, ordered a beer (much needed!) and proceeded to have the most mundane conversation.  Had he not spoken about our previous conversations or retold stories that I was familiar with, I'd still think this was a completely different person.  And to be perfectly honest, to this day I am not 100% convinced he was the same man.


There are sadly many more examples of online dating gone wrong, but I'll leave you with just two examples for now. 

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